The Wussification of America Amidst a Declining Society

I’ve spent the last several posts discussing and reminiscing of easier times in the prior couple decades. Well, easier times depending on how you think based upon when you entered this world. When did things start getting this bad?

What do I speak of by “wussification of America”?

I speak of this generation of kids raising kids as spineless, babied cowards.

I speak of the fact that too many people are looking for a handout or not willing to work for their earnings; of those who expect the handouts to get bigger each time and throw a fit when they do not.

I speak of those who have lost their jobs as CEO’s or corporate bigwigs in the declining economy and have exhausted their unemployment benefits because they refuse to accept a job with an income no less than that of a millionaire.

            I speak of neighbors running to the phone to dial 911 instead of being friendly and communicating with others in their neighborhood when there is a problem.

            I speak of the increasing divorce rate and lack of communication among families. The secrets and cheating and just tossing their partner aside over small things instead of working through their issues.

            I speak of the diminishing respect and values displayed by the future adults of society.

            Kids having kids is an issue all in itself. I saw a slideshow online recently of America’s youngest parents. Some of these kids were only 13-15 years old! But yes, kids are raising theirs as spineless babied cowards because they have not grown up themselves prior to considering reproducing. They are not mature enough to handle the responsibility so they baby their children because the parents are babies themselves, which brings me right into the next fact.

            I think one of the reasons society has gone to hell is due to the influx of those who expect the government or others to support them. Those who reproduce just so they can get BadgerCare and food stamps and child support because they do not care that they have six kids under 8 with five different daddies; they just expect not to have to work because they know how to swindle the system. And they cannot tell me that they are unable to find a job. I assisted a single mother of 4 the other day with job hunting and within 3 hours of being out there (not including drive time) she had two interviews scheduled and one job offer, and a handful of applications to fill out. There are consequences to actions and if those choices resulted in new life entering this deranged society, you had better be prepared.

            When I saw that beginning July 1^st this year, three counties in southeast WI are requiring those receiving FoodShare to either work at least 20 hours per week or be enrolled in a job search program, I could not have been happier. It will become mandatory state-wide as of Jan. 1^st, 2015. When did this STOP being a requirement? I was homeless in Jan. 2004 and staying at a homeless shelter. One of the first things we had to do was go apply for FoodShare because that automatically enrolled us in the job search program through the Job Center. They required a minimum of 10 job contacts per week (applications turned in or interviews/follow-ups) and related classes until at least 20 hours of work a week was obtained. It was a requirement then… what’s changed in the last 10 years?

            What has turned us into such a lazy society? Are the government handouts that good that nobody wants to work anymore? Yes, I understand that you need transportation to get to work to get money to obtain that transportation. I got to work AND school for two years via foot, bicycle, and bus. 7 miles one way. Once my transportation failed and I could no longer get to work, I relocated to a place where I could utilize public transportation. So nobody can tell me it cannot be done. Laziness is the only reason (excuse) it could not be done.

            Same was the case when the economy crashed and corporations were shut down. Those employees were able to receive unemployment benefits… until they ran out. Even after a couple of government-funded extensions, many of those people were still not working. Why? Because they refused to find ANY job to make ends meet or to attempt to get there; they wanted a job of equal or more pay.

            When I was on unemployment for the necessary times I needed to be, if I or an employer reported that I refused a job offer, there was an entire blown out investigation and it would be two or three weeks before I received a check again. I swore my whole life that I would never work in fast food but I ended up working at a Dairy Queen part-time for three months and continued seeking employment until I found a better job. Apparently these bigwigs thought they had it so good and would not settle for anything less. That’s pathetic. Do you really need that $400/month car payment and the $250/month cell phones and the mansion in a gated community to survive? No. Oh, maybe that’s why nobody is neighborly anymore.

            Scanner pages have been popping up on facebook recently. These are pages or groups where someone posts the calls that come across the police scanner and leave open for social media discussion. Some of the calls are pretty ridiculous. But what happened to the days where if you had an issue with a neighbor, it was resolved with a simple knock on their door or a phone call? The days where everyone knew who was who, and we could leave our doors unlocked, and neighbors looked out for each other?

            I see it frequently on the scanner pages: one person calls the police on their neighbor over something that could probably simply be solved with a quick visit instead of police intervention. But no, this is where the spineless, babied cowardice comes into play. Are you afraid your neighbor will answer the door with a rifle in your face? Unlikely. Communication is key. If my neighbors have their music blasted and are keeping me awake at 2 a.m., I am going to go knock on their door and nicely ask them to keep it down. The police are not needed unless I am aware of illegal activity occurring. If they punch me point blank, well then I will have a black eye and they will go to jail.

            But these days a person would rather grab the phone from the night stand and make a quick, anonymous phone call without even getting out of bed. Laziness. Why don’t people care to be friendly and neighborly anymore? Hating your neighbors just makes for unnecessary stress in what is supposed to be one’s safe haven. 

            And again, communication within the home (or more lack of it) is what keeps the divorce rate so high. Why do couples feel the need to cheat and keep it a secret? What happened to “for better or for worse, til death do us part?” Are those words no longer sacred? Some of the questions that come into The Dear Mike Page on facebook I just cannot believe. Dear Mike is a community advice column that can get pretty interesting in the questions and responses from the followers. I just cannot believe the amount of questions posted regarding relationships that can all be solved with some communication among the couples. Many are adult-oriented so I will not sum them up here, but come on now. It seems the norm these days is keeping one until the other does something they do not like, then toss them aside and move on to the next. I guess I just do not understand this mentality, since I am one of the few people I know whose parents are still married… yes, to each other.

            All this has also diminished the respect and values of our “children raising children” society. The young adults who are raising these overprotected, bratty, respectless, gimme, gimme, gimme children are not making the future of America any better. It does not help that parents are too afraid to discipline their children out of fear of being charged with child abuse. Without discipline, there is no respect. I was scared of my mama without her ever putting her hands on me, so one cannot tell me that discipline only comes in the form of beating your children. And you know what? I have respect for her and my elders.

            I have witnessed this recently, and close also. I have been out with family members who have children. In the first instance, the 4 year old told her mother what she was going to do prior to doing what her mother told her to. Oh, hell no… I put that kid right on her sitter and made her sit and think about it, while lecturing her about respect and her attitude. In the other instance, I had a 2 almost 3 year old climbing on the table and I told her to get down and sit on the other side of the table. The child told me “no” but she was in MY house. And you bet I put that child right in her place. I picked her up off the table and set her in the chair where I told her to sit and let her scream. I did not hurt the children in any way either time, and had permission from the parents in both instances, but this is what I mean. Or parents tell their children to do something once, twice, three, four times and the kid ignores them and eventually the parent gives up and ends up doing it themselves. How does a child learn? I will tell you how they learn… they learn how to get away with disrespecting their parents and this is exactly where the lack of respect begins. I saw a Dear Mike question posted a couple of days ago from what appeared to be a parent about how she cannot control her 14 year old son and she was wondering what amount of allowance to give him for doing simple tasks such as taking a shower. THIS is the future of America… the people who will be taking care of us when we grow old. Although with this kind of outlook, I am betting our kids will not want to care for us when we are old. They will just want whatever they can get and take it and run… because that is all they know, right?

            This is what I mean by the wussification of America. Why are we all living in such a paranoid society? Is the media to blame for glorifying violence in their news broadcasts? Is the economy to blame because so many have lost their jobs and willing to sink to any level to obtain necessities to survive instead of getting off their lazy butts and finding a job, even if it is less than they were making prior? Is it because this “bullying” thing has been blown way out of proportion? Everyone I know, including me, was bullied as a kid and it taught us all how to stand up and defend ourselves, 

not run home cryin’ to our mamas and consider suicide. Babies raising babies. As mentioned above.

            Maybe this is the reason I like being “old school”. Because I respect others and refuse to live so paranoid and uptight that I miss out on enjoying and living my own life. I believe in working for what you want and earning it, not taking it by force or criminally or expecting it to be handed to me. And if the day ever arrives that I do decide to bring a new life into this corrupt world, I will ensure they have the respect and work ethic that this generation is severely lacking. 

Feeling Nostalgic Day 10: Before Everything Became Now, Now, Now

"Automatic" by Miranda Lambert

I do not want to repeat the lyrics but it is 100% truth.

            Why does everyone seem to have the “now, now, now, give it to me now” mentality? Or they want everything done for them and handed to them on a silver platter on the red carpet instead of making the time to do so, as I eluded to in a prior post in this series. It’s as if our brains have gotten so used to a piece of machinery doing things for us or a technological object giving us the answer that we are incapable of using our brains anymore or doing anything for ourselves, then complain when it is necessary. Again, as mentioned earlier… I’m old school.

            I remember the first time I used an automatic toilet. I was young; maybe 7 or 8, and it was at the McDonald’s in Wisconsin Rapids. It scared the heck out of me and I ran out of that bathroom so fast…

            Who invented these things? Were there really that many people in the world in such a rush that they could not take two seconds to turn around and push down a handle?

            I think the automatic toilets are what made me terrified of public restrooms as a child. Or the fact that I believed I would get sucked down the drain with the toilet contents.

            I was 15 when we got our first microwave. This thing was enormous and took up ¾ of our counter space and only had a turn dial for time. One mode. The first time I used it I was babysitting a 7 and 3 year old for the summer and making leftover chicken for lunch. I took the foil wrapped chicken out of the fridge and tossed it in the microwave, turned the dial, and went to prepare the rest of lunch. About 5 seconds later the 7 year old asked me why there were sparks flying around in the microwave… yeah, I kind of forgot when Mom and Dad told me the night before not to put anything metal in there. I never did that again. By the way… food cooked in the microwave tastes disgusting. The microwave is for re-heating food to make it hot, not to cook a meal in.

            Remember the excitement of getting a card or hand-drafted letter in the mail from one of your friends or relatives? When was the last time you brightened someone’s day by sending a hand-written letter or homemade card? These days everyone communicates via e-mail, text messaging, facebook, instant messenger, snapchat, twitter, etc.

Whatever did we do in days prior to the Internet? We visited people in person instead of virtually. We wrote letters and sent them with stamps via the U.S. Postal Service, and yes, it would arrive three (or more) days later.

Everyone had a map or atlas in their vehicle and knew how to read it instead of a voice on the dashboard telling you where to go.

We would spend hours in a giant room full of books (known as a library) to research information alphabetically in an encyclopedia in order to perfect our research papers. Other books related to the subject were searched for using index cards in drawers, known as something called a card catalog. We couldn’t just google the information on our phones anywhere we were. I remember it being the coolest new thing when the library received a computerized card catalog, because then you could even borrow items from other libraries without driving 40 miles! And yes, even those would arrive three (or 103) days later, depending on how many copies vs. how many people were in line ahead of you for that item.

Books were paperback or hardcover or on a cassette tape… we could not read a book by staring at a flat screen that fit into our purse. We actually had to carry the physical book around.

If we were out and about and needed to make a phone call, we had to ask to use the phone wherever we were (if they would let you) or hope you could find a quarter in your pocket and a pay phone. The last time I remember using a pay phone was over ten years ago… at the Sand Lake Road Kwik Trip in Onalaska in 2003.

When a new movie came out on VHS… yes, I said VHS… we did not get to see it streaming on Hulu or Netflix… and pay-per-view did not exist unless you were a millionaire that owned land to place the spaceship-sized satellite dish in the backyard. We actually had to travel to the video store or somewhere that rented movies and pay to borrow it for the night, then ensure it was returned by 5:30 or 6 p.m. the following evening or they would charge you for another day’s rental fee. If you were lucky, you were able to keep it for two nights.

None of these fancy little debit cards existed… you were stuck waiting in the grocery store line while everyone in front of you wrote out a paper check. And you actually had to keep track of your expenses in your checkbook because the money was not removed immediately and if you were caught writing bad checks...ooh whee... you had better get to the bank during business hours to take out that cash because a 24 hour ATM had not been invented yet.

What has attributed to this society of impatience? In my blunt old school mindset, the rise in technology has turned society lazy and stupid. Stupid as in brainless.

Lazy in the sense that we do not even have to flush our own toilets because they’re automatic.

Lazy in the thought of not needing to write a letter or send out invitations because it can be done via a facebook invite or “poke”.

Lazy in the sense that we cannot do simple math in our heads because “there’s an app for that”.

Stupid in the sense that a ten year old cannot read a map because it is now a talking box on the dash.

Stupid in the idea that phonics is not taught in our public schools and kids are learning that txt tlk and “luv ya” is proper spelling and okay.

Stupid in the thought that one cannot memorize a phone number because it’s in their cell phone contacts and hopefully one never drops their lifeline of a call phone into a toilet, because those automatic things will flush right on your tush and you would not have any numbers memorized to call someone and you’ll probably be late for that meeting now because you cannot remember when and where it was without your lifeline of a Palm Pilot directing your every move… 

Feeling Nostalgic Day 9: What IS This Thing?

                As I mentioned in the introduction of what inspired this series, there is one list in particular that stands out. At the beginning of every school year, some expert or historian comes out with a list of things that this year’s incoming college freshmen never had the joy of using or experiencing. A couple things I have seen on this list are 8-tracks, record players, and corded telephones.

                My parents had an 8-track player. I don’t think we played with it more than once or twice.

                I had a record player until my brother decided to take it apart for some odd reason. I believe the needle disappeared after that. I used to record 70’s music from my Mom’s 45s onto cassette tapes. A few weeks ago at work I was singing along to the song “Henry the VIII” and a co-worker was surprised I knew the song. I replied that it was a song on my Funny Bone record, then she asked if I was old enough to have records. I laughed. I think the funnier thing is that I still have most (if not all) of those cassette tapes!

                There was one night at church our Pastor’s son found a record in the children’s room and asked my brother what it was and if it would play in a CD player! He had no idea what a record or record player was and this was about…. 15 years ago…

                So as far as the music industry goes, we’ve gone from 8-tracks and records to cassette tapes to CDs, and now satellite radio and zillions of songs on can fit onto a device the size of a AA battery in the form of MP3s. Children today will never know the struggle of trying to get a Discman to fit into your pocket while walking or riding your bike and figuring out how not to make it skip with every other step or turn of the pedals.

               

                What about videos? I’m not sure if anything besides reel-to-reel filmstrip was used back in the day… remember watching a “filmstrip” in grade school with the projectors? I do not really remember much about a beta player, except seeing the tape and machine once when my brother attempted to fix one.

                Then came those honkingly large VHS tapes in the gigantic plastic cases. Or setting your blank tapes to record 6 hours and hoping you set up the timer record properly to record your shows that were on while you weren’t home, and praying the weather was nice so it didn’t come out fuzzy and that the antenna was pointed in the right position for that channel to come in and that the VCR wouldn’t “eat” your tape while recording.

                Well, now VHS tapes are becoming obsolete and along came DVDs in cases half the size. It’s a never-ending project; trying to upgrade all my VHS movies to DVD, when I can’t even complete that project and then they come out with bluray! And the DVR, where you can pause and rewind live tv and record more than one show at a time on two different channels without the worry of a hungry VCR munching on your tape!

                As with the amount of music one can fit on a slim device and the large VHS tapes slimmed down to thin discs, televisions have also diminished in size. Just 20 years ago, a television in someone’s living room was the size of an arm chair. Then they needed to sit on their own piece of furniture because they were no longer a console but still large and bulky. Nowadays, a television is so thin it can be mounted right to your wall! And they are also “smart TV’s” that hook up to the Internet and stream videos and can basically do everything a computer can do. Who would have imagined a gigantic console TV could ever transform into a slender computer? It seems that everything is a computer these days: A television, a computer, a tablet, a cell phone, an iPod… and too many are glued to their devices 24/7. I got rid of my smartphone after 3 days… I pay for Internet at home, I don’t need it on the go also. More about that in a future post.

                I will never forget the story I read earlier this year. A young man on a crowded train in San Francisco had brandished a handgun several times during his ride, but everyone was so glued to their smartphones or iPods or Kindles that nobody even realized the man sitting next to them on the train was showing off a firearm. Until he shot and killed a young male who was exiting the train.

                Think about that. The night I read that story, I entered the break room at work and noticed the same thing. 10 people in there, and it was silent. Everyone was staring down at their smartphones or e-readers. For a split second I pictured someone entering the room and turning it into a crime scene without anyone noticing until it was too late. The only verbiage I heard was one asking another to send them a life in Candy Crush.

                A real life is what they need, not a virtual one.