Saturday, September 13, 2014

Feeling Nostalgic Day 10: Before Everything Became Now, Now, Now


I do not want to repeat the lyrics but it is 100% truth.

            Why does everyone seem to have the “now, now, now, give it to me now” mentality? Or they want everything done for them and handed to them on a silver platter on the red carpet instead of making the time to do so, as I eluded to in a prior post in this series. It’s as if our brains have gotten so used to a piece of machinery doing things for us or a technological object giving us the answer that we are incapable of using our brains anymore or doing anything for ourselves, then complain when it is necessary. Again, as mentioned earlier… I’m old school.

            I remember the first time I used an automatic toilet. I was young; maybe 7 or 8, and it was at the McDonald’s in Wisconsin Rapids. It scared the heck out of me and I ran out of that bathroom so fast…

            Who invented these things? Were there really that many people in the world in such a rush that they could not take two seconds to turn around and push down a handle?

            I think the automatic toilets are what made me terrified of public restrooms as a child. Or the fact that I believed I would get sucked down the drain with the toilet contents.

            I was 15 when we got our first microwave. This thing was enormous and took up ¾ of our counter space and only had a turn dial for time. One mode. The first time I used it I was babysitting a 7 and 3 year old for the summer and making leftover chicken for lunch. I took the foil wrapped chicken out of the fridge and tossed it in the microwave, turned the dial, and went to prepare the rest of lunch. About 5 seconds later the 7 year old asked me why there were sparks flying around in the microwave… yeah, I kind of forgot when Mom and Dad told me the night before not to put anything metal in there. I never did that again. By the way… food cooked in the microwave tastes disgusting. The microwave is for re-heating food to make it hot, not to cook a meal in.

            Remember the excitement of getting a card or hand-drafted letter in the mail from one of your friends or relatives? When was the last time you brightened someone’s day by sending a hand-written letter or homemade card? These days everyone communicates via e-mail, text messaging, facebook, instant messenger, snapchat, twitter, etc.

Whatever did we do in days prior to the Internet? We visited people in person instead of virtually. We wrote letters and sent them with stamps via the U.S. Postal Service, and yes, it would arrive three (or more) days later.

Everyone had a map or atlas in their vehicle and knew how to read it instead of a voice on the dashboard telling you where to go.

We would spend hours in a giant room full of books (known as a library) to research information alphabetically in an encyclopedia in order to perfect our research papers. Other books related to the subject were searched for using index cards in drawers, known as something called a card catalog. We couldn’t just google the information on our phones anywhere we were. I remember it being the coolest new thing when the library received a computerized card catalog, because then you could even borrow items from other libraries without driving 40 miles! And yes, even those would arrive three (or 103) days later, depending on how many copies vs. how many people were in line ahead of you for that item.

Books were paperback or hardcover or on a cassette tape… we could not read a book by staring at a flat screen that fit into our purse. We actually had to carry the physical book around.
If we were out and about and needed to make a phone call, we had to ask to use the phone wherever we were (if they would let you) or hope you could find a quarter in your pocket and a pay phone. The last time I remember using a pay phone was over ten years ago… at the Sand Lake Road Kwik Trip in Onalaska in 2003.

When a new movie came out on VHS… yes, I said VHS… we did not get to see it streaming on Hulu or Netflix… and pay-per-view did not exist unless you were a millionaire that owned land to place the spaceship-sized satellite dish in the backyard. We actually had to travel to the video store or somewhere that rented movies and pay to borrow it for the night, then ensure it was returned by 5:30 or 6 p.m. the following evening or they would charge you for another day’s rental fee. If you were lucky, you were able to keep it for two nights.

None of these fancy little debit cards existed… you were stuck waiting in the grocery store line while everyone in front of you wrote out a paper check. And you actually had to keep track of your expenses in your checkbook because the money was not removed immediately and if you were caught writing bad checks...ooh whee... you had better get to the bank during business hours to take out that cash because a 24 hour ATM had not been invented yet.

What has attributed to this society of impatience? In my blunt old school mindset, the rise in technology has turned society lazy and stupid. Stupid as in brainless.

Lazy in the sense that we do not even have to flush our own toilets because they’re automatic.

Lazy in the thought of not needing to write a letter or send out invitations because it can be done via a facebook invite or “poke”.

Lazy in the sense that we cannot do simple math in our heads because “there’s an app for that”.

Stupid in the sense that a ten year old cannot read a map because it is now a talking box on the dash.

Stupid in the idea that phonics is not taught in our public schools and kids are learning that txt tlk and “luv ya” is proper spelling and okay.

Stupid in the thought that one cannot memorize a phone number because it’s in their cell phone contacts and hopefully one never drops their lifeline of a call phone into a toilet, because those automatic things will flush right on your tush and you would not have any numbers memorized to call someone and you’ll probably be late for that meeting now because you cannot remember when and where it was without your lifeline of a Palm Pilot directing your every move… 


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